Tag Archives: plan

Ask all the questions, avoid all the chaos

Chaotic situations are rooted in no one knowing the answers they need to to stay calm, stand still, and think about basic shit like being quite while decisions are made. To survive after the apocalypse you’ll need to limit your social chaos. How? By asking the right questions —and then having the answers and making… Read More »

Non-Essential But Awesome Skills To Learn Before The Apocalypse

I have mad skills when it comes to Microsoft Excel. I can cook a mean dinner. And, I’m somehow capable of folding a fitted sheet without using curse words or outside tools. None of these skills will help me survive anything outside of a housewifeing contest or the cubical wastelands — everyday life. I was watching Ninja Warrior and… Read More »

Why The CDC is My Favorite Government Agency

The only thing worse than having a boring job is having a boring job that involves relaying boring information to people who have no interest in your latest report about whatever you’ve been on about in that sad little corner of yours. The CDC is the kid with the rock collection on show-and-tell day. Sure… Read More »

Post-Apocalyptic Fashion: The Shoes You Have

I bought a cute pair of shoes the other day. They made me sooo happy… until I wore them. Then, I wanted to bring them to life like Pinocchio just so I could beat them to death. What if I’d had to out run something? What if my train had stopped in the middle of God-Knows-Where and… Read More »