The Pros and Cons of Post-Apocalyptic Cults

I spent (and am still spending) the week at a giant national training mandated, organized, and run by my job. As I sat in theback of the auditorium and listened to people chant and cheer and say motivational things to one another and generally embrace the corporate culture, my mind began to wander.

What if motivational culture, structure, schedules, and tradition we all that some people brought with them through to the post-apocalyptic world. These things are what make many difficult situations tolerable. There is a shared language and bonding in the quirkiness and need for these tools.

However, if the situation did not call for these tools and the person on stage was not a motivational speaker but a tyrannical misanthrope, we’d have ourselves a cult [1. I have a very active imagination…].

I wondered what this would look like if that hypothetical tyrant on stage was speaking, not to employees, but to survivors. What would it look like, or even feel like if this was how every morning started before your rations were handed over. Many of your needs would be covered, from food to socialization and your survival would be based on community membership. The leader doesn’t even need to be a tyrant [2. but it’s more fun to think he is], Your leaders could simply be false prophets, motivational speakers, sales folk, a resourceful marketing team, a boy band, a cheer squad, or some other individual or small group with both charisma and a respect-demanding demeanor. Continue reading “The Pros and Cons of Post-Apocalyptic Cults”

The Mythical Land of Safety and Security and Free Food

It’s in the North. Unless you’re from the North, then it’s in the East. Well if, like me, you’re in the Northeast, it’s in Canada or out West. Maybe down south in Florida.

Wherever it may be, it’s a vague and general direction far from where you currently are. There’s someone in your party who wants desperately to go there. It’s the brand new Promised Land where fast food and hot showers still exist, who wouldn’t want to go there? A Smarty Pants is who.

Just like weight loss pills that not only work but also won’t eventually blow your heart up or destroy your metabolism, it doesn’t exist. Never wholly at least.

Continue reading “The Mythical Land of Safety and Security and Free Food”