5 Tips for (neurotic) Survival On a Boat

Last week I spent seven days on a boat and couldn’t stop thinking about the derelict barges in Orchid. Sure I was on a cruise to Bermuda and I drank a lot of Bud Lite Limes and mudslides and piña colada, but I was ever vigilant.

I’m not sure if I’d want to spend generations on a ship. No, I’m sure, I would not want it. See in Orchid there were Rape Gangs on the barges.

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Stress: It’ll kill ya.

Stress. Our bodies natural response to emotional experiences. Stress can be good or bad, but most people agree that when the bodies natural fight-or-flight response is prevented, it can cause some problems – including but not limited to: headaches, heart attacks, strokes, IBS, stomach ulcers and over-eating. It’s important to remember that the Human Being is still an animal – a clever, emotional, complex animal yes, but most of our responses are still rooted in the animal.

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5 Apocalyptic Lessons From Halo: Reach

Halo: Reach, the final installment-prequel in the Halo series by Bungie, chronicled the initial invasion and downfall of the human race on the planet Reach to the Covenant.

The planet Reach is humanity’s last line of defense between the encroaching Covenant and their ultimate goal, the destruction of Earth. If it falls, humanity will be pushed to the brink of destruction.

source

Known for it’s fairly short campaign mode and extensive multiplayer offerings,

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You could win a survival shelter!

And all you’ll have to do is go on a reality show. Spike TV are teaming up with Vivos Shelters  (who are basically a real-life, modern Vault-Tec, hopefully without the creepy experiments) for a new survivalist reality show. If you and your family are preparing for any kind of global disaster, and have always wanted a shelter of your very own, this is an excellent opportunity for you.

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Nothing is useless (except learning Klingon)

Studying a humanities degree adds almost nothing to your post apocalyptic survival chances. An appreciation of poetry, understanding dissent in terms of music or achitecture, or plans to take it into English later on, do absolutely nothing to defend you against psychotic robots. Also not great, is the way that studying as an adult student takes away time and resources from obsessive planning. £700 of money that could have gone to buying a gasmask and filters spent on furthering my education!

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Graphic Novel Review: DOLLHOUSE VOLUME 1: EPITAPHS

Publisher’s blurb:

The Rossum Corporation’s Dollhouse technology has gone viral with a synchronized phone call that wiped the minds of everyone it reached, turning them into mindless killers. Those who avoided the call–including show favorites Echo, Alpha, Mag, Zone, and Griff–must try to survive in the sudden apocalypse and be wary of Rossum’s expansive technological reach.

In DOLLHOUSE VOLUME 1: EPITAPHS (Dark Horse) 1 we get a look at the worst case scenario for the imprint technology used in Dollhouse the TV show.

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Some depressing truths.

The Apocalypse (hell, any massive disaster which you may need to survive) is not going to be fair. Books and Films and Comics give us the impression that, as long as we’re a ‘main character’ we’ll make it. Oh, there’ll be tragedy and horror along the way, and people will die almost as if it was designed to have an emotional impact, but we’re the leading characters. We’ll make it!

Most people see themselves as the leading characters in their own story.

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3 Free Comic Previews – Post Apocalypse

I don’t know if you’ve heard, but the saying, “if it’s free, it’s for me” doesn’t always ring true. See, on Comixology.com they’ve got more free comics than you’ll know what to do with. Literally, you’ll have so many options and so little time you might find yourself overwhelmed by the selection and possibilities. This is similar to the Kindle quandary: How do I know if this item is worth the time or dollar it takes to check it?

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Killing Zombies: What they don’t tell you

The likelihood of zombies rising up and trying to eat your face isn’t the point. What is the point is that if zombies do rise up you need to be prepared to kill them or you’ll get eaten.

Everyone knows you should aim to disable a zombie’s brain to take them down for good. But what do you do before you start swinging? How do you prepare to fight instead of flee?

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Winter Apocalypse Movie Round Up

Sometimes, here in the northeast, we have snow days. No, not just for school children, we get them for adults too. Another strange northeastern behavior: Every winter we act like it’s the first time we’ve seen or driven in snow. We have headlines comparing the weather to the apocalypse and news stories about what records the current cold or snowfall is breaking.

This year, we had almost no snow and nearly no days with the temperature below freezing.

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Race relations in the post apocalypse

I know race relations (or the possible lack thereof) isn’t necessarily something people want to think about, let alone talk about. But. Race relations, racial tensions, and all that other fun stuff that happens now will still be happening after the apocalypse. And I think at some point, those tensions may even get worse.

Personally, I think things might go a little like this: In the beginning, immediately after the apocalypse, people will be so desperate and willing to survive that they’ll join a group–any group–to increase their chances of survival.

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The Hollywood Tough Girl, and why she would die immediately.

In more recent years, Hollywood has attempted to be slightly less disgustingly misogynistic in it’s treatment of women, more out of an attempt to appear forward-thinking rather than a genuine belief that women are individual human beings.

One of these slight changes is the portrayal of awesome, kick-arse female characters in films (and other media. While the title of this article refers to Hollywood, I will refer to games and comics as well).

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Survival instruction nursery rhyme

Jamie made the following comment to my last post:

I really like the idea of making up nursery rhymes that carry survival instructions. Those kinds of things will stick in a kids brain and they’ll know what to do in certain situations without knowing how they know. If the apocalypse hits, I’ll be sending any future children to whatever school you’ll be running!

This, of course, had me thinking: what kind of nursery rhyme would a set of survival instructions make?

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