Free Hellevator Rides to Adorable Boss Battles

It’s no secret that I have an obsession with adorable violence. Therefore, no one will be surprised by my response to Hellevator: Ohmigawd, Yes!

Unfortunately, there isn’t a ton of information about Hellevator aside from the overview and download link. However, there is also a handy trailer and a cheeky little write-up.


Dark Souls crushing your soul? Needing a cute hit but craving that spooky-grim vibe? Hellevator has you covered!

Hellevator | Lil Death | Scope it Down Studios
Hellevator | Lil Death | Scope it Down Studios

Hellevator teams you up with the Devil himself in a ‘boss rush’ style game to escape the Circles of Hell. As the only son of the Grim Reaper, you must combine your strength with Lucifer’s and face the denizen of each level in a fast-paced, dark-fantasy boss rush game.

Oh, and an elevator is involved.

Experience the thrill of successive boss battles without the grinding to reach them. Slash, block and dodge your way to freedom, and experience the charming 3D underworld of Hellevator for yourself.

Continue reading “Free Hellevator Rides to Adorable Boss Battles”

GIANT BABY ZOMBIES: Language Game

Learning a language is a hard but important undertaking.

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I’m constantly starting and then forgetting to finish courses on DuoLingo.

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Hopefully, Giant Baby Zombies is the answer.

Giant Baby Zombies is a game that forces you to learn a language to beat it and save the world. Appealing to our sense of vanity might be the answer to forcing growth and development.

Maybe if the future of the world depends remembering the difference between camisa and comida people might be able to commit.

Zombies, Run was able to convince me to stay active because of an interesting apocalyptic story (and making me feel important). Maybe Wise Punch Games’ Giant Baby Zombies can get me to exercise my mind. Just the title is getting my imagination going… that’s part of the mind.

While language is important now, it will be will become especially relevant when navigating the post-apocalyptic world.

Giant Baby Zombies will launch around New Year’s Resolution season in 2018.

A batch of contaminated vaccines shipped to major cities around the world has led to an outbreak of Giant Baby Zombies. But not all is lost, their humanity can be restored.

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Your biggest challenge, as a military programmer, is operating an 1960’s supercomputer in a language you do not know how to speak yet. Launch state-of-the-art audio rockets that contain de-zombifying chemicals, and most importantly an 8-track cassette tape of a local language, recognized by the Giant Baby Zombies.

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What will you choose to learn? Japanese, Chinese, Irish, Spanish, Filipino, or English?

Name: Giant Baby Zombies
Price: $14.99
Release date: Early 2018
Platform: PC and Apple Mac on Steam
WebsiteGiantBabyZombies.com

Let's Talk about Sex… and Birth Control.

Step one to survival is being prepared for the worst before having to actually survive the worst. Some might say one of the worst consequences of sex is pregnancy. Fortunately, birth control exists to prevent pregnancy– If you’re prepared.

All of the many forms of birth control seek to accomplish the same goal: prevent pregnancy before it happens.

Some methods are for use before sex. Some for use after; and a few for use during sex. Regardless of the method, it’s imperative to have a plan if your plan isn’t to make a baby.

Planned Parenthood does a fantastic job outlining the many birth control options the world currently has to offer. They even offer a handy quiz to help you determine what the best method might be for you.

The Pill or condoms might be a great option while we’re living in the current state of things and shit has yet to hit the fan. However, after an apocalyptic event, while we’re seeking comfort in the private parts of others, The Morning After pill might be the best option. Continue reading “Let's Talk about Sex… and Birth Control.”

Survival Strategies to Stay Safe While Traveling Abroad | Infographic

This is a guest post by our ally Mike from Mike’s Gear Reviews

If you’re traveling abroad this summer what are your key priorities? Passport? Check. Suitcases crammed full of your finest shorts and vests? Check and check. How about safety equipment and items that could be the difference between survival or not? Yeah, didn’t think so.

Often it’s overlooked by many of us, but having essential safety equipment stowed away in your luggage is a vital component to having a stress free and safe vacation. Can you imagine being stuck in a remote location after a day of rock climbing, suffering a wound and not having a first aid kit to patch you up until help arrives? In some cases that could be the difference.

What about emergency services? Do you know the correct numbers to call in a foreign land? 999 isn’t universal. Quickly, it becomes apparent that personal safety is often neglected when it comes to preparing for a vacation, but fortunately, Mike’s Gear Reviews are on hand to give you the correct information you need to enjoy a safe and sound trip abroad. Read on and discover the essential bits of information for surviving in a foreign country!. Continue reading “Survival Strategies to Stay Safe While Traveling Abroad | Infographic”

Likely Apocalypses: Religious Apocalypse

So far in our list of possible apocalypses, we’ve looked at worldwide nuclear war, environmental disaster, the zombie apocalypse, and a robot apocalypse in more detail. Now, let’s take a look at the possibility of a religious apocalypse.

Okay, to be honest, a religious apocalypse seems pretty unlikely. (But if I’m wrong and god rains hellfire on us, then it’s probably also not survivable. Sorry about that.) Sure, there always seem to be a few people telling everyone and their dog that the Rapture is on its way and we’re in the End Times (and don’t forget the “Mayan Apocalypse” of 2012!), but apocalypse by deity is, at this time, not the most likely.

That said, nearly every religion speaks about the end of the world – eschatology is included in most holy writings in some way. (And, admittedly, it’s my favorite part of theology…maybe this was why my theology professors were always bemused? Hmm.) Christianity, with its Book of Revelation, probably has the best known religious apocalyptic example. And really, it sounds long, involved, and possibly complicated, what with the Seven Seals and the four horsemen and all that. But most, if not all, religions include something about the End Times in their books/texts/teachings. Even “ancient” religions (I use quotation marks because reconstructionists are bringing some of those religions back to life), speak about the end of the world. See: Ragnarok.

Regardless of what the religious texts claim will happen afterwards (a new and better world where there’s actual, honest to god world peace, for example), the end result is always the same: the world as we know it will end. Maybe God/the gods and goddesses/the Goddess/Source/the Universe/what have you just gets tired of watching us doom ourselves and steps in with the reset button. Who knows?

What could it look like?

Who knows! (I’m being serious.) Religions do talk about the end times, but they don’t always agree on what will bring about the end of the world. Now, I’m not well-versed in a lot of other religions, so what I know of their eschatology is based on Internet research. But, a quick Google search gives me a worldwide flood, a river of molten metal, demons, the Antichrist, a Judgement Day (no, not that Judgment Day), the degeneration of society (hmm…), and the appearance of seven suns in the sky. And those aren’t even all of the possibilities.

So really, when talking about specifics, no one actually knows what a religious apocalypse could look like. What we do know is that there will be doom and despair and destruction.

Sounds fun, doesn’t it?

Could a religious apocalypse actually happen?

Well, if there are deities out there watching us (and the end times haven’t started yet), I suppose there’s a possibility that they’ll throw up their hands in defeat and hit the reset button on human civilization because have you looked at us lately? We haven’t exactly been the models of modern major generals paragons of peace and love and kindness and friendship and all of those other general good things.

Okay, I suppose anything is possible. But I think it’s more likely that the gods will just abandon this sinking ship and pretend it never happened, so a religious apocalypse will probably not be a thing.

But if I’m wrong, I’m sorry. And if you find yourself sitting in a lovely handbasket during the end of the world, save a spot for me, will you?

What can we do to survive a religious apocalypse?

Repent, ye sinners. Or pray. Actually, I don’t know.

 

 

Likely Apocalypses: Robotic Apocalypse

Of all the likely apocalypses, the Robotic Apocalypse is one of the most unsettling.

The Replicators in Stargate were one of the most formidable enemies for any intelligent species because they cannot be reasoned with or stopped without completely changing your way of life to one that eradicates any metal components. You can’t drive or fly away because they take every piece of metal and MAKE MORE REPLACTORS. Their only objective is to reproduce, consequences be damned. Continue reading “Likely Apocalypses: Robotic Apocalypse”

Your Government is in Control, America. [Preparedness Calendar 2017 from Ready.gov ]

As the saying goes: The Best Offense is a Good Defense. But Preparing a good defense can be a lot of work and planning. Where does one even start when threats and possible calamities lurk around every corner all day, every day? Start with a calendar. Specifically, start with the Ready.gov 2017 Preparedness Calendar.

Continue reading “Your Government is in Control, America. [Preparedness Calendar 2017 from Ready.gov ]”

Likely Apocalypses: World Wide Nuclear War

Let’s expand on some of the likely apocalypses we touched on back in our list of likely apocalypses.

First up in the list of likely apocalypses: World Wide Nuclear War

Nuclear war may be inevitable, but we have been lucky so far. However, we shouldn’t kid ourselves that the end of the cold war has made the threat of the nuclear war an irrelevance. In a lot of ways, things are more dangerous than ever. There are two nuclear powers who refuse to play nicely with each other in Pakistan and India, then there is the newly armed and unpredictable North Korean regime, and a belligerent Russia keen to reassert its power to the world. According to analysts, there is a 5% chance that a nuclear war could happen every decade. All it takes is for someone to press the detonation button. A single US stealth bomber can carry 16 B83 nuclear bombs. Each of those bombs can produce 75 times the yield of the atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima, and a single Trident submarine can destroy over 40 million people. Continue reading “Likely Apocalypses: World Wide Nuclear War”