Map-Making 101: Navigating the Apocalypse

Alright, survivors-in-training, listen up! The end of the world is nigh, and you’re thinking, “How the heck do I navigate this post-apocalyptic maze?

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” Fear not, because today we’re delving into the art of map-making – a skill that’s more crucial than knowing which canned goods are the tastiest. So, grab your compass, dust off your sense of adventure, and let’s craft a map that even Indiana Jones would be proud of – casual, comedic, and confidently crafted.
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Step 1: Gear Up Like a Cartographic Boss: Before you embark on your cartographic journey, make sure you’ve got the essentials. A backpack, some paper, a few pens, a compass (because you’re not Magellan), and, of course, a snack – because map-making works up an appetite. If you’re feeling extra adventurous, throw in a hat for that explorer aesthetic.

Step 2: The Great Reconnaissance Mission: Time to channel your inner spy. Sneak around your area, take notes, and observe. Mark down significant landmarks – like that really gnarled tree that looks like it’s flipping off the sky. Note potential resources, danger zones (zombie nests, anyone?), and, of course, spots with good cell reception. Even in the apocalypse, Insta-worthy moments must be documented.

Step 3: Become the Surveyor of Your Domain: Now that you’ve gathered intel, it’s time to survey the land. Use your trusty compass to determine directions and sketch out rough estimates of distances. Imagine you’re on a treasure hunt for survival – X marks the spot where you buried your backup Twinkie stash.

Step 4: Master the Art of Doodling: No, seriously, doodling is an art. Start sketching out your surroundings with a flair for the dramatic. Mountains don’t just have to be triangles, they can be the Everest of doodles. Lakes? More like majestic amoebas of hydration. The more epic your doodles, the more legendary your map.

Step 5: Code Your Way to Safety: Create a legend for your map. No, not the kind with knights and dragons (unless that’s your apocalypse vibe). Use symbols to represent different features – a skull for danger, a heart for potential allies, and a thumbs-up for that place with surprisingly good post-apocalyptic coffee.

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Step 6: The Nifty North Arrow: Every map needs a North arrow, and yours is going to be the coolest one in the wasteland. Put your artistic skills to the test – a funky arrow, a bold N, or maybe an elaborate design that only you can decipher. Because in the apocalypse, even compasses deserve a touch of flair.

Step 7: Emergency Escape Routes FTW: Think of your map as the GPS of the apocalypse. Mark potential escape routes, hidden passages, and shortcuts. Remember, you’re not just a cartographer; you’re a post-apocalyptic urban planner. Bonus points for labeling these routes with dramatic names like “The Expressway to Evasion.”

Step 8: Embrace the Power of Color: Who said maps have to be drab? Grab some crayons or markers and unleash your inner Picasso. Color-code different zones – green for potential resources, red for danger zones, and maybe a nice pastel for the area where you plan to start your post-apocalyptic commune.

Step 9: The Legend of ‘Here Be Mutants’: Let’s face it; there will be mutants, and they need their place on your map. Draw friendly mutant territories, hostile mutant territories, and maybe even a neutral zone where you can negotiate with the more diplomatic mutants. You’re the Lewis and Clark of the mutant world.

Step 10: Laminate Like Your Life Depends On It: Your map is a precious artifact. Protect it like you protect your last can of beans. Laminate that bad boy, so it survives rain, zombie slobber, and any other apocalypse-related liquids. Attach it to your belt, wear it as a cape – just keep it close.

Congratulations, survivor! You’ve just crafted the most epic map in the post-apocalyptic world. With your compass in hand and your map at the ready, you’re now the cartographic hero of the wasteland. So, strap on your adventure boots, channel your inner explorer, and navigate the apocalypse with the swagger of someone who knows that, in the end, the best path is the one you doodle yourself. Happy map-making, wasteland wanderers!

The Abyss Beckons: Unveiling the Unexplored Depths of the Ocean in the Apocalypse

Ahoy there, intrepid survivors and ocean enthusiasts! Join me in this confident and casual exploration as we dive into the mysteries of the deep blue and ponder how the unexplored depths of the ocean might just hold the key to surviving the apocalypse. From Submarine Safe Havens to Aquatic Resources, let’s navigate the uncharted waters of possibilities.

1. Submarine Safe Havens – Beneath the Surface of Security: Imagine the apocalypse as turbulent waves crashing against the shores, and now picture yourself casually descending into the abyss in a submarine. Submarine Safe Havens become a strategic refuge, sheltering survivors from the chaos above.

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It’s the idea of finding security beneath the surface that turns the unexplored depths of the ocean into a sanctuary in times of turmoil.

2. Aquatic Resources – A Bounty from the Depths: Dive into the concept of Aquatic Resources – a treasure trove of sustenance waiting to be discovered in the ocean’s depths. Picture yourself casually harvesting a bounty of fish, seaweed, and other marine life to sustain yourself in the post-apocalyptic world. It’s the realization that the unexplored ocean holds the potential to become an essential source of nourishment for survivors.

3. Oceanic Energy – Tapping into the Power Below: Explore Oceanic Energy – a renewable resource lying untapped in the depths of the sea. Picture yourself casually harnessing the power of ocean currents and tides to generate energy for survival. It’s the notion of tapping into the vast potential below the surface that turns the unexplored depths of the ocean into a wellspring of sustainable power.

4. Coral Civilization – Building Underwater Communities: Envision Coral Civilization – a concept where survivors create underwater communities amidst vibrant coral reefs. Picture yourself casually constructing habitats that harmonize with the ocean’s ecosystems, creating a unique form of civilization below the surface. It’s the idea of building coral civilizations that turns the unexplored depths of the ocean into a canvas for innovative survival strategies.

5. Deep-Sea Exploration – Uncovering Hidden Technologies: Delve into Deep-Sea Exploration – a quest to uncover hidden technologies lying dormant in the ocean’s depths. Picture yourself casually stumbling upon forgotten research facilities or submerged archives, revealing advanced tools and knowledge that could reshape the post-apocalyptic landscape. It’s the prospect of deep-sea exploration that turns the unexplored ocean into a repository of forgotten technological wonders.

6. Underwater Agriculture – Cultivating in the Abyss: Consider Underwater Agriculture – a revolutionary concept where survivors cultivate crops in the depths of the ocean. Picture yourself casually tending to underwater gardens, growing crops that thrive in the aquatic environment. It’s the idea of underwater agriculture that turns the unexplored depths of the ocean into a fertile expanse for cultivating sustenance in the face of scarcity.

7. Marine Medicine – Unlocking Underwater Remedies: Embrace the concept of Marine Medicine – the idea that the ocean harbors untapped medicinal resources. Picture yourself casually discovering underwater organisms with healing properties, unlocking remedies to combat ailments in the post-apocalyptic world. It’s the potential for marine medicine that turns the unexplored depths of the ocean into a pharmacy of natural remedies.

8. Oceanic Trade Routes – Navigating Subaquatic Commerce: Engage in Oceanic Trade Routes – a vision where survivors establish subaquatic commerce networks. Picture yourself casually navigating submarines along trade routes, exchanging resources and knowledge between underwater communities. It’s the concept of oceanic trade routes that turns the unexplored depths of the ocean into a vast network of interconnected societies.

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9. Underwater Relics – Echoes of the Past: Recognize the existence of Underwater Relics – remnants of a bygone era submerged beneath the ocean’s surface. Picture yourself casually uncovering relics of the past, from sunken cities to forgotten civilizations, providing glimpses into the world that existed before the apocalypse. It’s the idea of underwater relics that turns the unexplored ocean into a repository of history waiting to be rediscovered.

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10. Oceanic Challenges – Navigating the Abyssal Unknown: Acknowledge the Oceanic Challenges – the formidable obstacles survivors face in the abyssal unknown. Picture yourself casually overcoming the trials of pressure, darkness, and marine life to carve out a sustainable existence in the unexplored depths.

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It’s the concept of navigating oceanic challenges that turns the uncharted waters into a testing ground for resilience and innovation.

Whether seeking refuge in submarine safe havens, harvesting aquatic resources, or uncovering hidden technologies, the ocean becomes a frontier of possibilities for survivors. So, fellow aquatic pioneers, may your journey into the abyss be filled with innovation, sustainability, and a deep appreciation for the untapped resources that lie beneath the surface. Happy exploring!

I'm Going to My Happy Place… The Far, Far Range from Slime Rancher.

According to XBox’s statistics, I’ve played more than 72 hours of Slime Rancher. That feels about right.

I’ve mentioned before that Winter in New England is one of the forgotten circles of Hell. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and create the reality you want to live in. The place I want to be my reality is The Far, Far Range from Slime Rancher. I want to live in a place inhabited by greedy slime and stupid chickens.

My husband would pick up Slime Rancher every so often and ask aloud, “How do you win this game?”

Winning isn’t the point. Not for me at least. Sure you could get all the achievements or, like me, aim to finish the Slimepedia. However, I find myself picking up Slime Rancher, not for the challenge of finishing it but for the feeling playing it. I just want to play. The dopey Slimes just want to play (and eat, they eat a lot).

Continue reading “I'm Going to My Happy Place… The Far, Far Range from Slime Rancher.”