What if the world already ended?

Every now and again, I watch the news on TV. I don’t usually watch the news because it tends to be worrying and depressing and makes me wonder the hell the world is coming to when every other story is about a murder, a bombing, a shooting, or some other neighborly thing like that.

Anyway. While recovering from a session with my personal trainer last week, I sat in the women’s locker room and watched CNN. (Before you ask, the locker room TV was tuned to CNN, I didn’t actually change the channel.) CNN was showing a segment about the Colorado movie theatre shooting (which, unless you’ve been living under a rock or possibly on Mars, you’ve heard about). The newscaster was talking about previous mass shootings, such as the one in Arizona that injured former congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, Virginia Tech, and, of course, Columbine.

All that positivity had me thinking, “What if the world has ALREADY ended?!”

No, really. Bear with me here. Remember last year, when Harold Camping predicted that the Rapture would happen on May 21? And then nothing happened and he was all “WTF?” and the world was all “Bahaha loser.”?

BUT. What if something DID happen? What the Rapture actually WAS on May 21, 2011, and NOBODY WAS SAVED?! (Yes, I’m well aware I probably just offended half a million people with that statement. Sorry, Bible Belt.)

What if we’re currently in the middle of the Tribulation?

Just a thought.

And now I’m going to go hide from all the really mad Christians who are offended because I suggested they weren’t good enough to be Raptured (luckily, I no longer live in the Bible Belt).

 

The end of the world: There's a magazine for that

Last week I was putzing around Target shopping for clothes for my kids. I took a detour through the books and magazines because this is what I do every shopping trip. I don’t normally find anything–local stores never carry the magazines I want to read (Discover, Astronomy, that sort of thing) and I’m a digital reader (I love my Kindle) so I don’t get many paperbacks.

But THIS time, I struck gold. And because I’m always thinking about the apocalypse in some form or another (usually because I’m looking for possible topics to write about), my brain somehow found this one magazine, even though it was sitting in the back of the stacks.

It’s called 2012 End of the World.

I kid you not.

I’m still trying to find ways to show you guys pictures without getting a copyright violation suit slapped on me and ICoS, so you’ll have to wait a bit for screenshots. I was thinking of doing an end-times collage (using images from this and other magazines)…would that be a copyright violation? It would be a piece of art (and I use the term “art” loosely).

Anyway. I’m going to give you an overview of the magazine. And, you know, review it. Because I read this shit so you don’t have to.

WARNING: HERE BE SNARKERY. AND LENGTH.

Continue reading “The end of the world: There's a magazine for that”

What does your apocalypse look like?

I have no idea how I missed this, but apparently, the biblical Judgment Day (a.k.a. The Rapture) will occur on May 21, 2011. That’s right. The Rapture will happen THIS SATURDAY. The world will end (by fire) five months later, on October 21.

Well, according to some people. But that’s not the point.

Continue reading “What does your apocalypse look like?”