Way too often I see games, movies, tv shows and whatever else where people are trudging through the zombie apocalypse and, surprise, they get bit on the calf or ankle. Duh! Cover your calves and ankles and this problem disappears.
See, when people die they fall down. On the ground. Around that area where your feet are… That area you’re not usually looking in when you’re walking forward.
Most apocalyptic video games are bleak and depressing. They’re set during a time where things are going or went horribly wrong. Twisted Pixel managed to take those aspects, cover them is pink frosting and sunshine, tie it up in a bow and deliver The Maw. A similar yet very different kind of game about the apocalypse and friendship.
If the only way to save the world is for me to do basic math, we’re all going to die. Math Apocalypse is an Android app game that tasks you with the tremendous pressure of solving math problems to defeat aliens invading earth.
Seems pretty straight forward and totally plausible to me.
Aliens walk in with a math problem over their head. You tap in the (correct) answer and your character zaps them to death with a bolt of electricity.
Pacific Rim is not a hollow, soulless film about big stompy robots. Pacific Rim doesn’t treat the audience like idiots. Yet, none of you are going to see it. This is a crying shame.
Pacific Rim is an impeccable summer action film. It is beautifully shot and well-told. There is nothing groundbreaking about it but if you wanted groundbreaking you wouldn’t be watching films about big mechs battling battling monstrous aliens.
We’ve said before that you aren’t going to be able to spend the whole apocalypse hiding away in a basement. You’re going to need to get out there, seize the wastes with both grimy hands. Scavenge strange new foods, barricade a whole new part of town. But there are going to be people out there who want to stop you from doing that. They want to hurt you. So you are going to have to murder them.
At some point in your post-apocalyptic future, you may be required to resort to cannabalism. Please be aware, there is no shame in this choice. You did what you had to do to ensure the survival of yourself and your community. You are still a good person, even if you’re a cannibal. Let go of the guilt.
One of my favorite things about apocalyptic shows and movies and the no-holds-barred “design” on everything from the outfits to the vehicles. Well,
Card games are an acquired taste for a past time. But maybe this one should be given a chance. This one has crazy vehicles and goblins! It’s like Halo meets Mad Max.
Check it out.
Each player plays a gang of crazed goblins that have traveled across the post-apocalyptic wasteland in broken-down vehicles to converge on a gigantic heap of long-discarded scrap – perfect ingredients for demented automotive modification.
Tower defense games are games in which you have a limited amount or resources available to build towers to defend your safe space from waves of enemies. Each wave defeated gives way to a stronger wave and loot you can use to build more or upgrade existing towers. [Like real life, except with do-overs!]
I like to say things like, “I’m not obsessed with [thing I spend time that should be allotted to other things doing].”
Sometimes I’ll be playing my tower defense game and not realize that an entire flight from Phoenix to Boston has passed me by.
Apologies again for falling off the planet these past couple weeks. Things have been happening that have affected my ability to write (well, more like my ability to stay awake long enough to write). I’ll probably tell y’all about it someday. Maybe.
Anyway. Back to the apocalypse. I’m convinced we’re going to put ourselves in some sort of apocalyptic situation sooner rather than later (I’m rather fond of the we’ll-blow-ourselves-up theory), so I’m starting to focus on all the little trivial things more than I used to.
In the past, I have made a big deal about how in the post apocalypse, I WILL be a benevolent dictator in control of a large, well run compound. Some of you seem to seem to think I might be joking about this.
Oh, no, sugarbuns. I fully intend to be a dictator. I’m already spoiled, petty and quick to anger – dictatorship should be a cinch.