exploiting your friends for better survival.

I’ll level with you: In recent years my friendships have been based on a complex calculation that is deciding only two things- how likely the person is to survive an apocalypse and how useful they’ll be in the aftermath. And if that sounds harsh and cold-hearted to you, you just aren’t invested enough in your survival to make this work.

My close group of friends is made up of arty types, who at first glance you wouldn’t think have anything to offer- but you’d be wrong. They’re biologists, fitness enthusiasts, martial artists and weapons collectors. They can make armour and have taught themselves to fight and at least one is borderline psychopathic. These are the people I want on my team. And they want me on theirs. We share loyalty and concern for each other, making us a tight and intelligent team right from the outset. Not only could we survive, but we could rebuild- and rebuild a civilisation, albeit one ruled by a benevolent tyrant (me).

Could your friends promise the same? Be honest with yourself. Your best friend- I’m sure they’re great, but could you trust them to stand back-to-back with you as the zombies circle? Would they actually be any good?

Find out their skills. Encourage them in the ones that are most useful after the end- it makes sense for your survival and it makes you look like a good friend.  As for the ones with no useable skills- well. You’re going to have to make a tough decision. Would you rather cut the useless dead weight out of your life now, or would you rather shoot them in the head while they’re being torn apart by zombies/mutants/badgers/nameless horrors? It’s less painful to drop them now. And if it makes you a pathetic, lonely shut-in, well, what price survival?

Still, don’t throw them out on their arse too soon. Even the most useless seeming skill (basket-weaving, ballroom dancing) could have a use in the rebuilding stage. As long as you think they could be kept safe until that stage, why not keep them along for the ride? But be honest. Are you sure you want to make that level of effort for them? After all, they have a really annoying laugh.

anninyn

Anninyn lives and works in the UK, though she writes in a world of her own. Raised on a steady diet of sci-fi, intellectualism and political thinking by hippies, she looks at modern life through a somewhat-...unique... lens. She is obsessed with the apocalypse, and can be reached at anninyn@incaseofsurvival.com for all apocalypse-based inquiries. She is working on her first novel. You can find out about her and her other work through her website http://cbblanchard.com/

7 Replies to “exploiting your friends for better survival.

    1. The ability to follow directions and use of careful footwork could definitely be vital in a booby-trapped filled wasteland.

    1. Ah, but Lutz made the horrible mistake of over promising and under delivering. That’s the exact kind of thing that would get you got in the future. Just leave his corpse behind to slow the zombies down and find a new driver who doesn’t lie.

  1. I remember Jos telling me once that he’d shoot me in the leg in a Zombie Apocalypse. Not out of malice, or any attempt to slow me down (although I’m sure there’s some of that in there too) but to watch my reaction.

    Apparently me telling him I’d shout movie quotes at him wasn’t a good enough indication I wasn’t a zombie.

    Maybe me telling him I’d shout movie quotes was the reason he’d shoot me…

Leave a Reply