Author: char

My apologies for not getting this up earlier. I haven’t been feeling well these past few days so I’m unfortunately behind on many things.

Regular disclaimer: This recap contains spoilers about episode 9 of Under the Dome, titled “The Fourth Hand.” Do not read this post if you have not yet seen the episode and plan to.

Okay. I seriously didn’t think this show could get any worse, but surprise! It has. Honest to Godiva, the WTF level increased exponentially with this episode.

I don’t even know where to begin with this episode. It’s just…wow.

Okay. Well. The episode opens with Julia taking Barbie to see the baby dome in the woods. Only…the baby dome and its resident egg is gone! (Dun dun dun…) Julia gets all Type A and flails around for a bit, telling Barbie she needs to find the dome (and the egg, of course). Then Sheriff Linda radios Barbie and tells him there’s a shooting and he needs to get his ass over to the house because someone’s gotten hurt.

Side note: Does everyone in Chester’s Mill have a gun? Or do they just pass their guns around so there can be a shooting every other week and Linda’s got something to do? Because seriously.

So anyway, Barbie shows up at the location of the shooting where some crazy guy who claims to be hearing voices from the dome has holed up in another guy’s house. The owner of the house shot at the crazy guy, but hit his neighbor instead (crappy aim on that one).

All right then. We already know Chester’s Mill is harboring some serious nutjobs (Junior, anyone?), so I suppose it’s possible that another nutjob has started communicating with the dome. After all, Joe and Norrie have, so why not someone else? Only, it turns out that Crazy Guy doesn’t actually have a direct line to the Great Dome. Instead, he has had a direct line to some new drug called Rapture, and the “had” is a key part in why he’s now a raving lunatic.

Also, Rapture was cooked up by the late Reverend Lester.

Honestly, that guy is in some serious trouble up at the pearly gates, now that Big Jim’s offed him. I mean, the Propane Plot, now drugs. Tsk, tsk, Reverend.

Ahem. So anyway. Junior shows up at the diner (but didn’t he promise Big Jim he wouldn’t get near Angie again? Seriously, these people), and Angie’s all “Get away from me! Get out!” blah blah blah. Which would probably have had more effect if she hadn’t suddenly had a seizure and started mumbling about pink stars falling.

So of course Junior’s convinced that he and Angie are meant to be together forever or something. He takes Angie to his mom’s art studio (I guess his mom was an artist? That’s new) and shows Angie a painting that his mom did. In it, Junior’s standing on a hill, looking up at a sky filled with…(wait for it)…pink stars.

So then Junior’s all, “Do you SEE?! You talked about PINK STARS! My mom PAINTED PINK STARS! This means WE ARE CONNECTED!!!” And Angie just kinda stands there and goes, “Uh…”

Yeah, I don’t even know.

Anyway, back to Julia. She talks to Norrie and Joe about the baby dome disappearing. They’re all perplexed, of course, because when are they not perplexed? Angie gets home and announces that she had a seizure and talked about pink stars falling, and Norrie and Joe ‘fess up and tell her that they’ve had those EXACT SAME seizures.

Creepy, right?

And of course their priority is to find the baby dome. Actually, it might be Julia’s priority, because she’s Julia, but Norrie and Joe seem pretty curious about it too.

It turns out that the baby dome is inside Joe’s shed/barn thing. Aww, it followed them home. But wait! It didn’t follow them home! Apparently Joe went on some sleepwalking hike and BROUGHT IT HOME WITH HIM! Because it was cold? I don’t know.

By this point, you may be wondering what the hell Big Jim’s been up to. I admit, I saved that part for the end, because this particular plot twist makes not even a lick of sense.

So. Suddenly and from out of nowhere (for real) some random blonde lady shows up at Big Jim’s house. (Remember, this is the ninth episode. Where the HELL has this lady been hiding for the last eight episodes that NO ONE has seen her or even knew she was in town? She’s not a local. WOULDN’T PEOPLE NOTICE HER?! Ugh.) Blonde Lady starts in on her spiel about her “arrangement” with Big Jim (meanwhile, I’m going “the fuck?!”).

That arrangement? Yeah, it turns out that Blonde Lady is the brains behind Rapture and she wants to go back into production so that she can supply the fine residents of Chester’s Mill with some apparently awesome drugs. And one of the ingredients for Rapture is…propane! (Ah, that Propane Plot finally comes to light.)

I…I don’t even. Seriously, is this for real?

So then Big Jim decides to collect all the guns because gun control! (Well, not really, but who the hell knows why Big Jim does things?) So Linda’s all, “But America! Guns!” because that’s the predictable Linda response. Big Jim, of course, argues that the dome is its own sovereign nation or something and the gun collection is voluntary. Barbie just gives Big Jim suspicious eyes.

Big Jim does his thing, people turn in their guns — except for that guy who shot at his neighbor at the beginning of his episode. He wants to KEEP HIS GUNS because they’re all he’s got left after his wife died. Also, he’s got a grenade and wants to kill himself with it. Big Jim then tries to comfort him and make him see that there’s SO MUCH to live for (under a dome).

Okay, so Big Jim should NEVER emote like that. It just doesn’t work.

Anyway, Gun Guy pretty much says, “Screw you” and pulls the pin on the grenade. But then! Big Jim GRABS IT AND PUTS THE PIN BACK IN!!!

I…I don’t…I have no words. Can you even DO that?! WTF.

Big Jim, after having saved the day, collects Gun Guy’s guns and adds them to the collection. Barbie goes with him to his house for some random reason and Blonde Lady shows up to congratulate Big Jim on everything going according to plan. Then she kisses Barbie, just to prove a point (and to let Big Jim know that she and Barbie know each other).

WHUT.

And then we’ve got Barbie and Big Jim posturing and blah blah blah.

Then Blonde Lady blackmails Barbie into working for her again, even though he was already working for her (I guess she’s the bookie he was working for back at the beginning of the series?). Barbie’s like, “There’s nothing you can do that would make me want to work with you again!” And Blonde Lady goes, “Oh yeah?

Well I’LL TELL JULIA YOU KILLED HER HUSBAND!”

Because apparently we’re all twelve years old or something. Also, WTF kind of plot point IS this?!

So yeah, now that that’s settled, Barbie’s in on whatever plot Blonde Lady’s cooking up, Big Jim’s stockpiling all the guns in their dungeon underground bunker, and Junior’s all “WTF is going on?!” when he discovers Big Jim with the guns in the bunker.

Dear god, this show just gets more fucked up every week. To wit: the episode ends with Norrie, Joe, and Angie coming to the conclusion that the baby dome is only for people who’ve had seizures (oooh, don’t tell Julia!). Then they all put a hand on the dome, which then lights up a fourth handprint… So then of course they’re all, “Let’s go find this fourth person so we can unlock the baby dome!”

Under the Dome airs on Mondays on CBS.

As usual: This post contains spoilers about episode 8 of Under the Dome (titled “Thicker than Water”). Do not read this post if you haven’t yet seen the episode and plan to.

Wow. Okay. This show has managed to raise the bar on WTF. Granted, it hasn’t hit Sharknado levels (yet), but…wow.

The episode opens with Junior going home, even though Big Jim kicked him out. (I don’t even know why Junior would do this. Clearly he’s got daddy issues. Though I’d probably be batshit crazy too if I had Big Jim for a dad.) So Big Jim apparently knows that Junior killed that Dundee brother, who is apparently actually dead now, and is unhappy about it. (But…why? It’s not like Big Jim’s all innocent. Remember Reverend Lester? And that propane guard from last week?)

Anyway, Big Jim’s all, “You’re not my son!” and then something about Junior’s mother, which makes Junior go, “You DID NOT JUST INSULT MY MOTHER” and Big Jim’s like, “Oh yes I did.

” The only thing missing was the finger snap. (Kidding. This dialogue didn’t actually happen. Though it might’ve made the episode more entertaining if it had.) Also, what’s up with the mother? Big Jim uses her as an insult a lot.

And then we go to Barbie digging a grave (presumably for Alice). By himself. With a shovel. And he does it PERFECTLY. Because OF COURSE he does.

Inside the house (I assume this grave is at Joe and Angie’s house because that’s where Alice died), Angie’s searching the kitchen for food and asks Joe why he hasn’t gone grocery shopping. Joe’s reply is, “But looting! And no food!” and Angie’s all, “Ugh, fine, we’ll go to the diner” because I guess the diner still has food in its pantry. Before they go, Joe tries to comfort Norrie, but then the ominous music started playing so I couldn’t figure out if Norrie was grieving or plotting murderous revenge. Or both.

On the subject of food, Big Jim goes to Ollie’s farm and proposes a partnership: they work together to provide food and water — Ollie grows the crops and controls the well, while Big Jim provides the propane to run shit. Ollie’s all, “NO I WANT TO RULE THIS TOWN I WILL OUST YOU IN A COUP JUST WAIT AND SEE” and Big Jim’s like, “Oh you think so, do you? I DON’T THINK SO.” Meanwhile, I want to throat punch both of them because oh my god WTF is wrong with these two?

So Big Jim, because he’s Big Jim, hatches a plan to confiscate Ollie’s farm under some random bylaw to a) get revenge for being humiliated, and b) get control of the well. As backup, he’s bringing the police and whatever “volunteers” he can draft into his crazy ass armed raid plan.

So Big Jim, the police (all three of them, including Junior, who’s on probation for killing that one Dundee brother), and the random townspeople who now get to use guns go off to Ollie’s farm. Ollie shows up with his farmer henchmen, who are more competent as bad guys and criminals than Big Jim’s henchmen ever were, so props to Ollie for that. Ollie refuses to turn over his farm and refuses to acknowledge the town bylaw. Then he threatens to withhold all food and water from the town because threatening! And then there’s a standoff and shooting and shit.

Then Junior switches sides and allies with Ollie. Because what the fuck?

But enough about the boys in the sandbox for a moment. Let’s visit Norrie and Joe! If you’ll remember, Norrie’s mom Alice died last week. Norrie seems to be going through the stages of grief, though she seems to have skipped the denial stage and has just gone straight to anger. At this point she blames Joe for Alice’s death, because Alice had the heart attack right when they touched the little dome. And OF COURSE it’s Joe’s fault that they touched the little dome because it was his idea to go look for the dome’s power source with his weird “the dome is an atom” thing.

Joe, because he seems to lack the ability to empathize with anyone, goes to the diner with Angie and draws a picture of the little dome with the dome-egg. Which Julia sees. And then Joe tells her about it. (OMG JOE WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT.) So Joe and Julia go off to see the little dome and its pet egg, which is now glowing pink. (Does this mean that it’s communicating with whatever entity put it there? Ooo…aliens! Maybe?) Julia then touches the little dome (because of course she does) and sees another Joe saying, “The monarch will be crowned.”

Because THAT makes sense. (Later, we see Angie with a monarch butterfly tattoo. Which…ugh. Seriously.)

Then Julia tells Joe what she saw, and Joe’s reply is, “You saw me? But we saw Alice when we touched the dome and then she died! DOES THAT MEAN I’M GOING TO DIE OMG WAAHH.”

And then we see Norrie and Angie throwing snowglobes (that I think Junior gave Angie) at the dome because it’s cathartic or something. Um, okay.

All right. So, back to the boys who can’t play well in the sandbox.

After Ollie pretty much humiliates Big Jim in front of a bunch of people for not falling on his knees to worship/turn over the farm like Big Jim wanted, Big Jim’s all pissy because I don’t know, maybe he feels emasculated or something.

So OF COURSE Big Jim wants to go back for more standoff and shooting. He’s all, “We go back and TAKE THE WELL!!” And Linda, because she’s all idealistic and shit, replies with, “But DIPLOMACY!” And Barbie, because he’s the Marty Stu of the series, comes up with an alternate solution and says, “We should blow up Ollie’s well and divert the water to ALL THOSE OTHER DRIED OUT ARTESIAN WELLS! Then Ollie can’t control the water!” And Big Jim replies with, “Mrah *chest-thumping* I RULE THIS TOWN AND WE WILL DO THIS MY WAY *chest-thumping* MRAH!”

Ugh.

Meanwhile, on Ollie’s farm, Junior and Ollie are bonding in this weird revenge-against-Big-Jim moment. Then Ollie tells Junior that his mom didn’t actually die in a car accident; she died in a car accident of her own making (ie she committed suicide). Junior’s all, “No she wouldn’t do that YOU’RE LYING.” Ollie’s like, “I would NEVER. But your dad totally would.” And Junior’s all, “RAWR I WILL KILL HIM!!!”

And I’m like, “Jesus Christ, seriously?”

So yeah, the raid is on for that night. People start gathering at the edge of the farm with Big Jim, but Barbie sneaks onto Ollie’s farm to blow up the well. Because what. I don’t even. So Big Jim does his “Mrah! *chest-thumping*” bit and tells people where to go with their guns and all that.

Linda then says they should wait. And Big Jim realizes that Barbie isn’t with the group and he’s all, “Did Barbie go to blow up the well? MRAH MY PLAN MRAH!!!” With chest-thumping. And guns.

And then Barbie actually does blow up the well (after fighting one of Ollie’s farmer-henchmen dudes in hand to hand combat, of course). Predictably, Big Jim is all, “MRAH MY PLAN IS RUINED DAMN YOU BARBIE MRAH *chest-thumping*.”

People run away, blah blah blah, and then Junior appears out of nowhere and hits Big Jim in the face with the butt of his gun. Big Jim is taken to Ollie, who’s posturing and trying to be threatening and all that. Then his henchmen leave and he goes after them with his gun. Which conveniently leaves Big Jim and Junior alone for a few minutes — just long enough for Junior to ask why Big Jim lied about his mother all those years ago.

While being his normal psychotic self, of course.

So Big Jim explains that Junior’s mother was “already unstable” and ran out after they had a fight. She got in the car and drove into a tree going like 80mph or something. And then Big Jim and Police Chief Duke covered it up. (Aside, if she was already unstable, wouldn’t you GET HER HELP? You know, BEFORE she drove herself INTO A TREE? Honestly these people.)

Junior: But WHHHYYYYY????

Big Jim: I didn’t want you to know she chose to leave us WAAAHHH.

Ollie (who has come back from chasing his henchmen, apparently): HE LIES!

So Junior shoots Ollie.

Because THAT makes sense.

Anyway, with Ollie now dead, Big Jim’s back to being the big man on campus and he’s his old smug self again. Barbie confronts him and is all, “People DIED because of you. You should’ve LISTENED TO ME. Blowing up the well wouldn’t have killed anyone! And IT WORKED! You didn’t want to blow it up because you wanted the well so you could CONTROL THE TOWN!! Mrah *chest-thumping* mrah!”

Big Jim, now that he’s comfy and secure in his position of power, is all threatening and “You do NOT want me as an enemy.” And Barbie’s like, “Ditto, dude.” (Remember, Barbie is an ex-military bookie’s enforcer. Big Jim is…I don’t even know.)

And then Junior’s back at the station and tells Linda he was a Trojan horse and destroyed Ollie from THE INSIDE.

WTF.

Under the Dome airs on Mondays on CBS.

As usual: This post contains spoilers about episode 7 of Under the Dome (titled “Imperfect Circle”). Do not read this post if you haven’t yet seen the episode and plan to.

So yay! We’re officially halfway through this season! Only six more episodes of a show with remarkably unlikable characters.

Anyway. This week in Chester’s Mill, the residents all have water again (because, you know, it rained when they needed it to and they’ve also got that farmer’s artesian well). So no riots. Except for the Dundee brothers, who aren’t rioting so much as running around bullying people. But WITH GUNS so it’s okay (or something).

Violently armed brothers aside, in Chester’s Mill we also have to deal with morning after awkwardness. Yep, Barbie and Julia (who last week shared a kiss) are waking up in bed together.

This still seriously squicks me out because of the whole “Barbie killed Julia’s husband and she doesn’t know” thing. But maybe that’s just me, I don’t know.

And then this random (very) pregnant lady shows up at Julia’s house asking for yogurt. Seriously, what? Where the hell did this pregnant lady come from? I thought Chester’s Mill was a small town? Though I can understand the yogurt bit (Pregnant Lady says it’s the only thing she can keep down); there was a point when all I could keep down was ramen noodles, so yeah, sometimes your food options are limited.

Also, she has the world’s roundest pregnant belly. Does anyone actually have a round pregnant belly? Or am I the only one who gets a strangely shaped belly while pregnant? (The size of Pregnant Lady’s belly doesn’t bother me; I might actually have been larger than she was during my third trimester(s). Which is…well, it’s large.)

So anyway, after Pregnant Lady gets her cup of yogurt or whatever, she waddles off (well she didn’t, but if she really WERE pregnant she’d have been waddling like a duck down that sidewalk) and runs into a hallucination of her husband, who is currently deployed. She thinks that maybe he’s come home early and reaches out to touch him. Only OF COURSE HE’S NOT THERE (because how could he have gotten inside the dome?) and she ends up touching the dome.

Which then sends her into early labor. BECAUSE OF COURSE IT DOES.

Meanwhile, at the Crazy Rennie House, Big Jim is chewing out Junior for locking her up in the dungeon underground bunker (and he’s not being particularly friendly or fatherly about it). And THEN he tells Junior he’s sick. And kicks Junior out of the house (what?), before telling him that if he gets near Angie again, he’ll be sorry. (And I’m going “OMG IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW. NO WONDER JUNIOR’S INSANE.”)

Then Big Jim tells Angie she can stay at his house, and Angie’s all, “Haha no, not gonna happen.” But she does say she wants to say goodbye to Rose first, so Big Jim gives her the keys to the diner (I guess he owns it). So off Angie goes to the diner, where Ben (remember Ben?) finds her and helps her bury Rose. Afterward, they go back to the diner to clean it up.

Farmer Dude opens up his well for the town, and he’s all smug and shit because I don’t know. Big Jim proposes a partnership (propane and water) so that together they can rule the town. Ollie, all smug, asks Big Jim if the propane supply is still his. Big Jim’s all, “WTF? Of course it’s still mine!” while I want to punch Ollie in the throat.

(Not that I like Big Jim more, mind you; it’s just that Ollie’s particularly grating with his smug doucheness.)

It turns out that Ollie’s taken over the propane supply but cutting off the lock and replacing it with his own. Also, he’s posted a guard there.

Okay, wait. What? Is this propane thing common knowledge in the town? Does everybody know where it’s being kept? If not, how did Ollie find out where it was? Did he have Big Jim followed during one of the propane delivery runs? WHAT IS GOING ON?

Later Ollie shows up at Big Jim’s office and is even more smug and douchey because he’s got the well, the crops, AND the propane. Now he’s gloating because he rules Chester’s Mill! And Big Jim. (You know this is going to be a recipe for disaster, right?)

Linda and her deputies are off looking for the Dundee brothers because they have to be arrested and all that for killing Rose. And then she tells Junior that they were about to rape Angie (OMG LINDA WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT.) So Junior’s all, “Let’s KICK THEIR ASSES!” and Linda’s all, “But THE LAW!” and I’m like :facepalm:. (Seriously, how does Linda’s idealism survive in this place?)

Julia’s taking Pregnant Lady to the clinic. On the way, they get gasjacked by the Dundee brothers (I THOUGHT BARBIE KILLED ONE OF THEM?!) because gas is more valuable than the car or something. Barbie comes to their rescue (because of course he does) and shoots one of them in the leg. (The same brother he strangled last week, so maybe the Dundees are like cats and have nine lives or something.) He tells Linda and Junior where the brothers are headed and then helps Julia take Pregnant Lady the rest of the way to Alice’s. Why Alice’s? Because the clinic’s closed and Alice is apparently the only doctor (or anyone with medical training) left in the entire town. (Except, if you’ll remember, Alice is actually a psychiatrist so I don’t know.)

Alice of course takes charge and Pregnant Lady’s in active labor blah blah blah. But THEN Alice starts to get weak (she’s run out of insulin, remember?) and Barbie has to take over as midwife. Alice talks him through clamping the umbilical cord because it’s wrapped around the baby’s neck, and of course Barbie can do it. With a shoelace. And of course he can deliver the baby LIKE A PRO. (WHAT. THE. FUCK. This guy’s Marty Stu-ness is irritating as hell.)

You may be wondering what happened with Joe and Norrie and their weird connection with the dome. (Or not. But I’ll tell you anyway.) They find a little dome in the woods after Joe’s all “What if the dome is like an ATOM?! That means it’ll have a NUCLEUS IN THE MIDDLE!” (What? Seriously, what? I mean, okay, an atom will have a nucleus and electrons and shit but where the hell does he come up with this stuff?)

Inside the dome is…a black egg. (Oooo, aliens! Maybe?) They try talking to the little dome, but nothing happens so someone suggests they touch it. When they do, Norrie sees an image of her mom, and she automatically knows that something’s wrong (HOW?) so she rushes back to Joe’s house.

Where Alice has a heart attack and dies. What. (Also, crap, the town lost its last doctor.)

Meanwhile, Linda and Junior find the Dundees and Linda tries to arrest them. Of course that doesn’t work, so shooting and shit.

Both of the Dundees die. (Well, I think they did. I thought one of them died last week but apparently not so who the hell knows.)

Oh, and Big Jim loses his (drunken) shit and goes to the propane supply place, shoots a fuel tank or something on the guard’s truck, and watches the truck blow up. With the guard inside. (Can that actually happen? Didn’t Mythbusters do a segment on that?)

And in the woods… the black egg starts to light up. (I really hope it’s phoning home…)

Under the Dome airs on Mondays on CBS.

As usual: This post contains spoilers about episode 6 of Under the Dome (titled “The Endless Thirst”). Do not read this post if you haven’t yet seen the episode and plan to.

So. Last week: missile! This week: there’s still a dome!

Surprise, surprise, not even the MOAB (mother of all bombs) could crack the dome. It’s indestructible. Maybe it was made by aliens! (That’s my vote, anyway.) So we have the residents of Chester’s Mill trying to figure out how the hell the damn dome could survive getting bombed. Especially when the land around the dome now looks like it’s a war zone.

And then Sheriff Linda tells Big Jim about Reverend Lester (who, if you’ll remember from last week, Big Jim essentially killed). And Big Jim is all, “Oh no! Not Reverend Lester! This dome is KILLING EVERYONE WE KNOW AND LOVE!” blah blah blah.

And then the townspeople are all, “OMG WHAT’S GOING TO HAPPEN WHEN WE RUN OUT OF FOOD AND SHIT?!” And I’m like, “FINALLY someone’s asking the questions people should’ve been asking five weeks ago!” I was also like, “Oooh, does this mean we’ll finally get some riots?!” Because seriously, I expected the rioting and panicking during the second episode. Not gonna lie, the non-rioting has been a real disappointment.

Anyway. Back at Angie’s house, Junior’s trying to get Angie to trust her. In a non-TSTL moment, Angie’s looking at him like, “Fuck this shit, you’re totally insane,” and then smacks him in the head with some glass thing. And then she runs. Away. Which is a good way to go when you’re trying to get away from the psychotic tendencies of Junior Rennie. I’m just saying.

So anyway. Norrie’s mom Alice ran out of insulin and is now suffering from lack of insulin. This, obviously, is Not Good. She wanders into the street, disoriented, and the semi coming directly at her swerves to avoid hitting her. Unfortunately, it hits the water tower instead. And then water! Everywhere! Which is seriously crappy because this is the town’s water supply. (And honestly, after seeing that water tower, it doesn’t really seem all that big, so how has it not run out by now?)

And THEN the people start getting panicky and rioty. Finally, right? Barbie and Linda go to the town’s water source, which is a lake outside of town (and is conveniently inside the dome). But alas, the water’s been polluted with methane, so no drinking water for you!

Big Jim, being Big Jim, has a solution: go into the artesian wells underneath Chester’s Mill! But he has to negotiate with Ollie, the farmer who owns the land above the last remaining well. Ollie, of course, is all, “So what do I get for it?” and Big Jim is like, “How about the gratitude of your fellow residents?” Ollie’s reply is, “Screw that. Give me propane.”

But Big Jim, being Big Jim, HAS PROPANE! (Remember the Propane Plot we know nothing about?) So he delivers propane, and Ollie’s like, “This isn’t enough, you have to keep GIVING ME MORE PROPANE!” (Dude. Greedy much?)

And then the people start rioting. Like, for real rioting. There are fights, people stealing, people looting, blah blah blah. And Angie, who has run into the town’s diner (WITH NO SHOES) because it’s some sort of sanctuary, ends up getting knocked out by two looters (who turn out to be the Dundee brothers, whoever the hell they are). Rose, the diner’s owner, ends up being killed by one of them. And for what? Frozen meat. I guess some people just can’t live without their steaks. And bacon. (Okay, I can understand the bacon.)

Anyway. Not forgetting about Reporter Julia, she’s off trying to find the power source for the weird static noise thing coming out of the radio and the police walkie-talkies. DJ Dodee has come up with some sort of device that can track the signal, and they track it to… Joe and Norrie! Who happen to be breaking into people’s houses trying to steal insulin for Alice!

Because yes, that makes sense, doesn’t it?

Dodee and Julia figure out that Joe and Norrie are attached to the dome somehow, after the two of them touch the dome and then the car radio starts working. (Yeah, I don’t know.) So Joe tells Julia and Dodee about the seizures and shows them the video. Dodee wants to tell Big Jim (NOOO) and Julia’s like, “We can’t do that! Do you know what they’d do to them?!” (FINALLY! Something that makes sense!) And Dodee’s all, “Fine. I won’t tell anyone. FOR NOW.” (Dun dun dun…)

Meanwhile, the rioting is getting so bad Linda and her deputies (of whom Barbie is now one) use tear gas from just after 9/11. Barbie’s like, “Dude, seriously? This stuff’s over ten years old. It’s not going to work.” And then when it doesn’t work he’s like, “Told ya.” (Well, okay, maybe not, but I’m sure he was thinking it.)

But THEN. It starts raining! Just when the town needed water the most!

HOLY DEUS EX MACHINA, BATMAN. Seriously, how convenient was that? (Or maybe I’m just really disappointed the rioting was so damn short.)

Barbie asks Big Jim to take Angie to the clinic after he rescues her from the diner (oh, like THAT’S gonna end well).

Yep, as I thought, Big Jim didn’t take Angie to the clinic. Instead, he takes her to HIS HOUSE. Where he proposes a deal: he’ll make sure Junior never touches her again, AND he’ll make sure that she’s provided for (with propane, food, guns, blah blah blah), IF she forgets the whole thing ever happened. Angie makes Big Jim promise to protect Joe, too, which he does. But then she’s all, “I don’t know….” even though she told Rose (before the looters showed up) that no one’s going to believe her story because Big Jim’s a councilman and Junior’s a cop. So really, wouldn’t this be a good deal?

Anyway, Junior shows up before Angie can “think it over” and he’s all, “WTF? What are YOU doing here?!”

Oh, and, there’s this weird romance brewing between Barbie and Julia. Which is just icky to me because, oh yeah, Barbie killed Julia’s husband.

Come back next week, where I poke at the people in the biodome again!

Under the Dome airs Mondays on CBS.